Goodbye, 2012!

I have to admit I was ready for 2012 to be over.  Is that wrong?  I saw everywhere how God upheld me and strengthened me and blessed me in 2012 – but I was ready to move on to this year.  Ready to move on to new hope and a new possibility of joy in 2013.

I was excited in September to start reading through my Chronological Bible for the first time.  I’m pretty dense when it comes to history (or any historical events for that matter) so it’s been pretty great for me!  Anyway, I just started the story of David last week.  Since I’m reading chronologically, I actually read the events of David’s life alongside the psalms that he wrote at the time of those events.   It’s a completely different way of reading the Bible and I love it!

Just the other day I was reading Psalm 13, which was probably written when David was fleeing from Saul.  As I read the first part of the psalm – my heart resonated with what David wrote:

“How long, O Lord?  Will you forget me forever?

How long will you hide your face from me?
How long must I wrestle with my thoughts

And every day have sorrow in my heart?

How long will my enemy triumph over me?

Look on me and answer, O Lord my God.

Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death;

My enemy will say, ‘I have overcome him.’

And my foes will rejoice when I fall.”

(v. 1-4)

As I was reading, I thought, “Doesn’t this just fit perfectly?”  I’ve certainly felt like God has forgotten me and hidden His face from me. Just like David, I think, “Okay, God, that’s enough.  You can make things better now.” 

You know, there are tons of psalms that David wrote – begging God to rescue him from a difficult situation or from pain.  There were times in David’s life that were absolutely painful, that rocked him to his core.  There were times when he didn’t even want to keep living.  But if you keep reading through David’s story – you’ll see that eventually he was made king over all Israel.  He was the greatest king that Israel ever had!  He was the FIRST relative to be named in Matthew’s genealogy of Jesus! 

 “This is the genealogy of Jesus the Messiah, the son of David, the son of Abraham” (v. 1)

 I’m sure when David was having those really bad days, he wasn’t thinking about being a great king or being forever famous because Christ was going to be in his family line.  I’m sure he was only thinking about the pain.  But eventually, the pain ended and God ushered in a time of great blessing for David.

And so, reading through David’s life has grown my faith and begun to spark a new hope within my heart.  I may be in a time of pain but I know that God will soon usher in a time of great blessing.  A time of blessing so great that I will remember no more the pain of now.

I’m hopeful that God will grant me the desires of my heart this year – that Shawn and I would be able to have children.  I’m hopeful that God will “look on me and answer me.”  As the year 2012 ended, I thought about the end of Psalm 13.  I read it on December 30^th while we were visiting Shawn’s parents.  I smiled when I realized that David wrote this, even in the midst of his pain and suffering, and that he meant EVERY word of it.

"But I trust in your unfailing love;

My heart rejoices in your salvation.

I will sing to the Lord,

For he has been good to me."

 If you’re hurting right now, don’t forget that God’s love never fails.  He has been good to us and He will continue to be good to us.  Sing to the Lord and endure the suffering - painful as it may be.  And know that God will eventually usher you into a time of blessing so great that you will remember no more the pain of now. 

As for me, I will trust in God’s unfailing love.  I will rejoice.  I will sing.  He has been good to me.  Yes, I’m very glad that 2012 is finally over.  I’m excited to see what 2013 will bring for me and Shawn.  And now, I think I’m finally ready to look at adoption and begin moving in that direction. 

Hope is kindled…

For those in need of hope,

Melissa